How odd. I have not been consistent with my blog posting this year but here I go to enter a post and my whole post about my cancer diagnosis is GONE! Gotta love computers. Anyhow, that may be fairly confusing to anyone just tuning in to see a post about chemo! May have to do a small timeline here.
Feb.15, 2012 I was diagnosed with Stage 2 colon cancer. Had surgery to remove half my colon, tumor was removed, considered cancer free. Doing 6 months of chemotherapy every other week as a preventative measure for future reoccurring of colon cancer. Chemo began middle of April.
SO, onto chemo. I officially have 3.5 rounds under my belt. What do you mean 3.5 rounds?! Well, one misconception people have is that when I go into the clinic for my infusion on Tuesday's, chemo is done. Not the case (although I wish it was!) Here's how it goes: Every other Tuesday I go to the clinic. I sit down and am stabbed. Yes, STABBED! (that's what I joke to my oncology nurse) She sprays my port with a cooling spray, takes a needle that is kind of like a thumb tack, pushes it into my port, connects an IV line to my port and voila, I'm hooked up. First things first, she has to take two tubes of blood to be tested in the lab. Bad blood= no chemo. What constitutes bad blood? Low white blood cell count and low platelet count. Sometimes I meet with the doctor to review side effects and sometimes I don't. Normally I am in clinic from 9am-2:30pm. Here's where the ".5" part comes in. Before I leave the clinic they hook me up to my "Chemo-to-go." I call it my Sachel. You know like the one Alan has in the Hangover?? See here:
I used to joke that I needed to Bedazzle the thing but it's pretty incognito and not to mention I return it on Thursdays and other patients use it. Don't know that a 75 yr old man would want to be walking around with my bedazzled sachel ;) Anyhoo, when I leave the clinic on Tuesday's I am hooked up to an IV that leads into my bag that contains my box with my chemo medicine #2 in it. I wear this for 46 hours. Yep, I sleep with it too. Showers? Don't ask. Let's just say I take a shower Monday night, sponge bath it Tues. and Wed, and then Thursday when I get disconnected I come home and jump right on it!
So, how does chemo make you feel? I compare it to the worst hangover/stomach flu/food poisoning you've ever had in your life but it lasts for 5 days or so. I have learned that the term "least aggressive chemo" is an oxymoron and at the end of the day it is poison that takes quite the toll on the body. My doctor says I have been having pretty severe side effects so she has lowered my dosage a little bit in hopes that it will help. Fingers crossed. What kind of side effects you ask?? I won't get into all of them but I'll share the weird ones. So the nausea is awful. (for me). My nightstand looks like a pharmacy with all of the medication on it. They have given me 5 of "the best" anti nausea medicines and nothing does the trick. That is one of the worst side effects. That along with "razor blade throat." Chemo affects nerves pretty significantly and creates sensitivity to cold, swallowing or touching. The sensitivity to touching cold just started this round. I reach into the refridgerator to grab something and it stings my finger tips. Swallowing is definitely bad. Drinking cold drinks I cannot do. It is hard to explain but it really feels like razor blades cutting my throat when I do. Room temperature, I can't even drink that for about a good week or so. Same effect. I'm the girl drinking hot cocoa, coffee and tea when it's 95 degrees out! So much for cooling down this summer! Last round I literally could not drink anything but a few cups of cocoa Tues-Thurs. so when I went in to get unplugged they had to give me an IV of fluids to keep me from getting dehydrated. Neuropathy. This is a nerve condition causing pain and numbness in the hands, arms and feet. I do not have much pain at all but the numbness just started last round. It is not constant by any means but weird things like I go to move my hand and arm and it feels very heavy and I really have to concentrate of trying to make it move. I went to grab something something off the counter, imagine your thumb touching your middle finger. Well, my thumb wouldn't move back into place. I had to use my other hand to move it. That happened just a few times. My lips will tingle on occasion. This is just the tip of the iceberg. I receive shots every other week to boost my white blood cell count. Chemo round 1 totally wiped them all out. No white blood cells in your body means you can't fight infection and since chemo kills your immune system you need the white blood cell count to offset that a bit. The shots are working for me which is awesome! One thing I have learned is that everybody and every BODY reacts differently to chemo. Some effects I have others don't and vice versa. Just interesting. In a nutshell all of these lovely side effects and more have me bringing sexy back in a big way ;)
I will say there is nothing more humbling though then sitting in a chair next to somebody twice my age or more, who receives chemo every week and has for over a year and is literally fighting for their life. I am constatantly reminded of how lucky I am for the situation I am in. My situation is not bad. I have life. I am cancer free. Another thing I have learned is that Cancer patients/survivors are each others biggest cheerleaders. It's kind of an unspoken thing. You don't want anyone to endure the pain you have. I had a girl who was going to be going through breast cancer chemo knowing she was going to lose all her hair say to me "I heard you don't lose your hair with your chemo! I am so glad you don't have to go through that!" Talk about love, support and grace. Also, when anyone in the clinic is having their last chemo treatment you cannot help but feel SO HAPPY for them! It is like we are all in the same race, but it's not against each other, it's against ourselves. When someone crosses the finish line we are all cheering them on knowing eventually it will be our turn. Also, I have to do a shout out to Oncology doctors and nurses. They have the kindest hearts of anyone I have ever seen in the medical field. I do not leave that office without getting at least 2 hugs during the time I am there. They laugh with you. They cry with you. They hold your hand and listen to you. And they remind you that you can do it and it will be all worth it in the end. A special breed they are for sure.
3.5 round (we'll call it 4 ;) ) which means 8 more to go. 1/3 of the way there. WOO HOO! So, here's my update. Maybe it's TMI but I'm just updated all of those who have shown so much love and support to me and our entire family during this time. The cards keep coming, the texts and emails to check in, the prayers and prayer lists I have been put on cross country, it all means to world to me. My cup runneth over, truly. Thank you for keeping my spirits up and for all the love. ♥
